Nirbhaya,Priyanka…..how many more

When the last breath came out of her body,
Her mind would have been blank
No thoughts ,no pain ,no fear ,only an engulfing darkness- a soul leaving the hands of life ,gliding down in to a valley of darkness.

A disgusting feeling tinged with relief that she is leaving this inhuman world where human life has no value and where demons have taken over humanity.

Or

May be her hands would have stretched out for someone who would save her

May be a guttural cry for help would have come out of her lips

May be she hoped that God will send an angel who would cover her body from the beastly eyes of those animals

May be last drops of tears trickled down on her cheeks thinking about her mom n dad

May be …..

But no such thing happened- a blooming life was lost in the hands of lusty ,brutal,inhuman and barbaric “so called Humans”.

A girl was raped brutally ,murdered and charred to death .People are condemning the act ,politicians are politicizing the issue,reporters are brewing up morning tea cup news and high profile citizens tweeting their concern.

This will go on for a fortnight or maximum a month and then it will be forgotten. Like Nirbhaya act another act Priyanka act will come and another mother will run from pillar to post asking for justice.

Then people will forget.It will be a forgotten story.All this gung ho will die its death.

Then after few months another victim ,another story …..This will go on.

There has to be an end to it.No agitation and no candle light March can stop this.If we want that such incidents should stop it will only be by changing the minds of today’s misguided rudderless youth.Easier said than done.But that’s the only way we can ensure that people will start valuing the life of another human being.

It’s time we stop asking the girls not to go out at night,not to wear the dresses of their choice,not to put on makeup.Its time we start teaching Men to behave.Its time to make them realise that they are not dogs but human beings.

It’s time parents teach their adolescent son –

• When a girl says NO its NO.

• When you disrespect a girl you are disrespecting your mother and sister

• If you misbehave with a girl ,we will be the first persons to take you to the cops.

• A child learns what he sees in the house.If a father wants his daughter to be safe ,first he should set an example by being respectful to women.

……to be continued.

An Experience par Excellence

The 9th of May 1983 was the threshold of a life long journey of two entirely different strangers who decided to travel together.It was a roller coaster ride.And today after 36 years when I think about it,only one thought comes to my mind – Thank you God for this blissfully gifted life.
We planned to celebrate this anniversary at Rambagh palace Jaipur(in spite of our apprehension that it’s going to be very hot there).We took a flight on the 9th morn and reached at the Palace by 3 pm.The warm and traditional welcome by the staff made us feel that we have traveled back to bygone eras.Everyone around wished us Happy wedding anniversary.That was amazing.No other place would have been befitting than Rambagh palace to celebrate our 36th wedding Anniversary.

This place is a culmination of history ,heritage,romance,nature and inimitable hospitality.The staff at the hotel make you experience the royalty with a touch of affectionate and genuine hospitality.Ms.Arushi was our host .Within no time she made us feel that she is our kith and kin.Along with her team she made our day very special. (Not to forget the point that they had upgraded our room as it was our anniversary.)The grandeur of the palace makes you awe struck.When we returned to our room after the heritage tour of the palace and the enthralling folk cultural programme in the luscious lawns,we were pleasantly shocked to see the decoration in our suit.Floral wishes on the floor,A delicious lip smacking
Cake on a beautifully decorated trolley and rose petal bath ,all of them were overwhelming. A Special mention about the beautiful photo frame with our photograph which was just awesome .Thanks to Arushi.We appreciate the efforts taken by Himmat ,
Irshad ,Praveen for arranging the things and a special thanks to Manjusha for the rose bath.The palace is spread over an area of 67 acres of land with sprawling lawns and 150 peacocks who are a special attraction.The dinner served at Swarna mahal was just amazing and the way Mr.Kishan made us enjoy the taste of different rajasthani delicacies is worth mentioning.The next day morning ,our breakfast was at Rajput Room where we were taken care by Ms.Manpreet Kaur.She was very cordial and polite.We spcially liked Egg Benedict.My husband loved the Masala Dosa,crisp n hot.

While checking out we were presented a photo collage (I was told that Arushi had prepared for us),a beautiful gift and a best wishes card with our photograph by Mr.Vikas Chauhan.It was a home away from home.We got very emotional when all of them came out to say good bye to us .It was like our family members bidding farewel to us.

Work Smarter Not Harder


mhcx5lkve4grmlkbm5c5a8bf868afd

I grew up with the adage “ There is no substitute for hard work”. If this is the only mantra for success then, the hardworking Donkeys would have been ruling the world. Unless there is a “Tadaka”(seasoning) of smart work in your efforts your efforts will only provide you mere “Daal Chawal” and not “ Biryani and Kababs”.

I always give my students the analogy of Two Porcupines. There were two porcupines Hardy and Smarty who were going on a morning walk in an orchard. They come across an apple tree. Being on a fitness regime they wanted to eat the apples. Hardy climbed the apple tree plucked some apples ,ate one sitting in the tree and also carried a few to the ground. All this exercise had exhausted him and so he slept sitting under the tree. But before sleeping he advised Smarty to do the same as he had done.

Smarty was an independent thinker. He never liked following what others did. He thought for a while and then………. – He vigorously shook the apple tree, resulting in lots of apples falling on to the ground. Then he collected all the apples in to a heap. After that he climbed the tree and fell on to the heap of apples. All the apples got struck to his quills. Victoriously, he walked back carrying apples on his back.

Smarty had put in less effort but he worked smartly and he could collect lot more apples than Hardy. So, just working hard blindly does not pay you returns. What is required is Smart Work.

Successful people do the things differently

Now, the stumbling blocks for many are the myths

• You are as smart as you are born to be.
• You are born with a particular IQ which sticks to you throughout your life.
• Your mind’s ability doesn’t change
• Your brain capacity is static.

When we believe in these myths , we become our own enemies.

Its high time we come out of this trap and face the reality that today, we are not competing with only humans. Thank you AI.

Things to Remember:

• Remember that 99% of extremely smart people were not born extremely smart , they became smart because of their dedication and commitment to be a life long learner.
• High Intelligence is nothing but great ability to recognize a pattern and problem solving which is trainable. It’s like training your muscles by exercising.
• A high IQ is like height in a basket ball player. But to play well the basket ball player requires many more skills.

Here are some insanely simple tips which can help you in living a smart life.

1. Be in the company of smart people: Make a rule that you surround yourself with smarter friends. Its better to have 2-3 smarter friends rather than having ten who are otherwise. This will increase your baseline intelligence level. The intellectual discussions and the knowledge sharing will certainly work positive on your brain functioning.
2. Read: Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. The more you read, the more your brain reaches its optimal health. History proves that all the famous personalities were certified bibliophiles. Read self-help books and also the books on various contemporary developments in the fields of science and technology. Carry a book with you always. Instead of falling pray to social media distractions unfold the secrets of various books and discuss with the book lovers. There are books which will change your life. One such book is “The Secret by Rhonda Byrne”. My life did not remain the same after reading this book. I am planning to write an exclusive blog on Life changing books very soon.
3. Intelligent use of online time: Online addiction has become a necessary evil. None can be without it. But use this time productively. Listen to educative podcasts, TED talks, self help videos. Watching inspirational videos keeps me motivated. My recent favorite are Mind Valley videos. Use online resources for work out, meditation and relaxation.
4. Make a “Did List”: Making a work done list will give you great happiness and satisfaction. Majority of the people make “To Do” list. Give a twist and make Did List. When you see that you have done number of tasks in a day, you will feel confident and happy. Try it out. It works.
5. Be grateful: I am a great fan of Rhonda Byrne. Recently we were at a workshop conducted based on her book “ Magic”. This book stresses on the life changing magic i.e GRATITTUDE. Everyday,make a list of ten blessing of your life and read it You can be grateful to GOD, to parents ,to spouse, to children, to the air, to your breaths, to your heart. After writing and reading those blessings ,you will be overwhelmed. The more overwhelmed you are, the more refined you will be. The more purity of mind and heart the more blissful you will be. The happier you are, the smarter you will be.

grateful

6. Break your comfort zone: Your brain is at rest, no stress, everything going on smoothly, life is going on well. You are in your comfort zone. Why to break it? Your brain doesn’t want any change. No change, rigidity , stagnation and then deterioration. Change is must, new challenges necessary and so, breaking out of comfort zone is essential. Learn some new language, pursue a new hobby ,take up new challenging tasks. Being in comfort zone for a long time will stiffle your brain. It will stop functioning. A little stress of facing something new will bounce back your creativity, decision-making and problem – solving ability to the front.

comfort-zone

7. Commit to healthy lifestyle: Change in lifestyle includes healthy eating, regular exercise, stress management and proper rest. A tired, unhealthy and stressed body can not host a healthy mind. There are many smart apps which you can use as your personal lifestyle trainers. I am a fan of smart watches and meditational apps. They smartly monitor you and remind you that you have been inactive for a long time, so its time to move or its time to relax. Market is flooded with fitness programmes and gyms. Make use of them and be fit. A smart mind in a smart body.
8. Travel: The world is a travel book and if you don’t travel you are stuck on the first page of the book. Travelling to new places gives you new experiences, new perspectives. This experiential knowledge will improve your cognitive skills. Get bitten by the wanderlust before your life journey ends.See some unique places. Some places in my bucket list are-

alps

ALPS

northern lights

NORTHERN LIGHTS

Turquoise-Lagoon-Bora-Bora

TURQUOISE LAGOON,BORA BORA

maldives

MALDIVES

penguines in antarctica

ANTARCTICA

My bucket list is very long. I have ticked off a few and a few more I am going to visit soon. Travelling will make you more enriched, enlightened and enchanted.

9. Learn to say No:

learn-how-to-say-no-note-illustration-vector

Saying NO is a great and important art.Being social animals we tend to say Yes for most of the things which are unimportant and harmful to us.We try to be people pleasers.But the fact is YES MEN never do anything great.We are not born to please everyone.BY saying Yes to something unimportant we are saying NO to something very very important.Use your discretion and decide what to reject and whom to say NO.Our inability to say NO lands us into situations which cause lot of stress resulting in increased cortisol levels in our body.This turns us down into an IDIOT.

10.Shun Negative People: The negative and toxic people leave an oversized impact on your life.They totally drain out your energy and leave you overwhelmed.They are malicious malware ,if left unattended ,completely paralyse your system and you will start functioning weirdly .The only way to heal yourself is by throwing them out of your lives.

Thank you GOD – Thank you ,thank you ,thank you

Thank you GOD – Thank you ,thank you ,thank you

The day started at a usual note.Got up at the break of the dawn,ran through the daily chores,relished my delicious and refreshing ginger tea which kickstarted my day at a high energy level.Bruno – the lord of my house🐶was supervising us after devouring his morning biscuits 😀.A punctual scheduler as he is ,he chided us out of the house for our morn.
walk.
Ravi and I escorted our smiling Bruno through the morning walk,graciously cherishing the compliments volleyed at Bruno by the passersby.
Bruno has a special Cherishma which effectively works on the feminine gender.The pretty fitness freaks always land up petting and patting Bruno lovingly.(sometimes I feel that this makes my bitter half a bit J)🤪.
This morning walk time is precious for all three of us.Its “Us Time”.We talk,we discuss,we plan and we argue(Often our arguments upgrade to the next level )But they always end by the time we return home.
The next half an hour I suddenly turn into Robot 😆-have my breakfast,pack my lunch ,dress up and then zoom into my car.
The journey time from home to my workspot is the most personal time for me “The Me Time”- Its the time when I am all by myself, it’s the time when I am what I am without any hassles of social obligations.
This is the time when there is an outburst of uncensored emotions.Sometimes I laugh aloud ,Somethimes I sing sometimes I cry my heart out so intensely that the tears totally block my vision and sometimes I dance(sitting dance🤪).If my car could speak or write ,it would have tweeted all my personal things on twitter.
But today,I had an exceptionally ecstatic n blissful experience. As suggested by one of my colleagues I found myself practicing Gratittude Visualisation .
First Scene
The scene of my first birthday (unbelievable but true)My father lifting me very gently and taking me out of the house ,loud noises ,lot of people and lots of flowers.I ,crying and baba trying to calm me.
* Thanks baba for so much love and affection.No one could have loved me so much.
# I found a tear tickling down on my cheek.The tear of gratittude.
Second scene
My father and I getting down of the car with my priced purchase -a new pair of goggles.Before we entered the house I broke them into two pieces.😭.I still remember I was dead scared .But my father’s words still ring in my ears “Koi baat nahi.We will buy another one”.
*Thank you baba for understanding my fears.
# I found myself totally choked and overwhelmed.
Third Scene.
I see myself standing in ICCU in Oregon City Hospital looking at my husband who was on bed, unconscious. The doctors were unable to diagnose the cause and I was standing helpless but strong enough because of my infinite faith in the Almighty waiting for the miracle to happen.
The miracle did happen.My husband opened his eyes and in a real filmy way said ” where am I ”
*This time I found myself crying uncontrollably out of thankfulness.
# I found myself repeating ” God I dont have enough words to thank you.You have filled my life with countless blessings.
#You gave me amazing parents ,most loving n understanding life partner and world’s best sons and daughters.What more anyone can wish for..

THANK YOU GOD .Thank you ,Thank you ,Thank you.

The Anatomy of Unhappiness.

kevin+george,+mental+health+energy+spiritual1276439685..jpgHalf the world suffers from this disease called Unhappiness.Some are unhappy because of circumstances and some are unhappy because they choose to be unhappy.

Yeah you read it right .Some choose to be unhappy.I am going to talk about them in this post.This tribe of people will find hundred and one reasons to justify why they are unhappy and how the whole world is conspiring to make them unhappy.

These set of people consider every other individual to be their enemy.

They feel they are the only ones who are suffering in this world.

They feel they are born to suffer and if they enjoy even for a second it’s a sin.

They have high expectations from everyone around and when these expectations are not met they are unhappy

They crib about the problems they face but never try to find the solutions.

Another remarkable characteristic adorning their personality is pessimistic attitude.They will always find the glass half empty and never half filled.

They never live in present .Either the past haunts them or the future threatens them and the joys of today get submerged under the past and the present.

Unhappiness is a disease.Get rid of it .It’s in our hands to cure it or bear it.

The people infected with this disease are incurable since most of the time they are genetically disposed .

When they look at the people who are always happy they consider them to be fortunate .They fail to accept that destiny is by choice and not by chance.You make your destiny ,you make your life hell or heaven.

Be at ease and be happy or be at dis(ease) and be Unhappy

Wait .The Dawn is about to break..

BdYIuugCMAIqGlq.jpg

The darkest hour of your life has the brightest ray of hope because this hour is the ultimate .Nothing can be darker.Now the only thing that can happen is the breaking of the dawn.Any time ,any moment the ray of hope will steer clear the darkness and drench your soul with light.

So when it’s pitch dark just wait for the bad time to pass.Don’t become weak,srenghen yourself physically ,emotionally n spiritually.The new dawn is about to embrace you.

We are born to be Happy

14 - 1.jpgYeah. We are born to be happy.Let not the outside world disturb our inner peace.I know it’s easier said than done.But we can always make an attempt.

Our happiness or sorrow depends on our reaction.Every situation brings to us two choices-either to react negatively and create a hell around us or react in a more balanced n mature way with optimism and create a heaven around us.

The choice is ours.

Either to feel pathetic or to feel good.Lets choose to feel good.Lets excise our right to be happy.